Means, it begins with us. Being charitable beings, means having charity as character, as part and parcel of our beings. This cannot happen, unless we experience it in our lives, by first being charitable to ourselves.
We try for the most part to be kind to others, considerate and giving. We do our best to help others, and support each other as best we can. We try not to think malicious thoughts of others, and try to understand different viewpoints whether we agree with them or not. We make allowances for other people. This helps make us charitable beings. We are generous and helpful toward the needy. Where however in this action, are we generous and helpful toward ourselves.
At first glance we think that we are. We live or strive to live comfortable lives, as comfortable as our environment and circumstances will allow us to be. We pay ourselves first before paying into others. This however, has nothing to do with the thoughts and actions that we unleash on ourselves. We fail to be generous and helpful, toward our thoughts of ourselves. We are critical, unforgiving, merciless and relenting when it comes to our flaws. We are always self-scrutinizing our actions and choices, berating ourselves for failing to succeed, make better choices, and think wiser. With each unfortunate experience, we condemn ourselves, mock ourselves, and let ourselves know that we simply deserve what happened, due to the choices that we make.
We are quick to respond to a loved one’s call for help, however fail to recognize our own calls for help. We are faster in quietening our own cries, relegating our emotions to simply that, failing to recognize that God put emotions into our systems, so that we may have valid and physically recognizable signs as to our emotional health. We are quick to state and display love for others, yet do not know how to state or show ourselves inner love, that has nothing to do with physical purchases and acquisitions.
We teach ourselves that we love ourselves, by the things that we buy and acquire. We state that we deserve things, because we have worked hard for them. We forget that much like any other human out there, we too, are human, and are in need. We believe that our need is not comparable to what we see with our eyes, failing to see what bleeds in our souls. We rely on others, to be charitable to us, to help us out, to see what we refuse to see in ourselves. Should we be disappointed by the results, should people let us down, fail to recognize or misinterpret our needs, we blame and condemn ourselves.
We do not know how to be charitable to ourselves.
We may believe that we are giving by nature, and not attribute this to upbringing, thought process, or whatever the case may be. We may not realize, that we are hardly giving to ourselves. We do not show ourselves mercy, do not allow ourselves to feel what is inherent in us, do not allow ourselves to be human. We spend our time, being something to someone, that our hearts wish, was that thing to us.
This is an invitation, to be charitable to ourselves. This has nothing to do with how much we spend on ourselves or attain. This is an invitation, to allow ourselves to be human, and live in the moment. How can we be assured that we will not falter, stumble and fall? We cannot, for as long as we are human, we are destined to live such lives. Our guarantee is based on the risen Christ, in whom we should place all trust. By placing all our trust in God’s Son, can we then be human, and allow Him to do His will in our lives, while humbly acknowledging a key way in which we have erred, in the way we have treated ourselves, by attempting to be both god and human, creator and finisher of our continuing story, by attempting to steer our lives, our way.
When we are human, and allow Christ to be God, we allow ourselves to live our lives, in the moment and circumstance that we are in, secure that we have help every second of every day. Only then, do we see how much we have failed to be charitable to ourselves in grace, forgiveness, hope and love. It only through the passage of time, that we see through faith in Christ, that our lives have been changing, that we have been growing, and now why we give. When one receives grace in abundance, one gives in abundance.
By undermining our self-respect, ability to live and learn through mistakes, lessons, trials, joys and pains, ability to grow, morph and breath in all different ways, we undoubtedly allow elements such as society, upbringing and personal viewpoints to determine who we are to others and ourselves. We continually refine our definition of who we are to others, completely forgetting about the true definition of ourselves, which can only be found in a daily life spent with Christ.
He shows us who we are, what we are, and are going to be, each day with each decision that we make. He is charitable to us, full of mercy and patience, offsetting any amount we could attempt to bestow on ourselves. He lets us know what is important and what is not, what is born of ego and what is conviction. He believes in us ceaselessly, so that we, and only we, punish ourselves for true and deemed mistakes. It is true that love conquers all. We fail to understand this based on situations and people.
The truth is, change occurs when we finally and fully recognize love. When we see a situation that we want to change, in that moment, our souls recognize love of self, to want to change a situation. When we see undying love in another human’s eyes, regardless of what we do or say, it restores hope in our lives. When we receive love in another human’s action, whereas a negative emotion in such a situation would suffice, we see our worth at the time. In all these ways, Christ reveals His abundant mercy and charity to us. By placing all trust in Him, we can experience charity throughout our lives, for He is not human, He does not let us down by separation or death. His continual display of charity in our lives is permanent, until the day we die, so that in living this, it becomes us, charitable beings.
We can be charitable, and we can be helpful. However, we truly fail to learn how charity works, when we forget ourselves. It is impossible for us to know how we have wronged ourselves, but we can take up Christ’s invitation, when He said love your neighbour, as you love yourself, to ask Him to explain what He means when He said, as you love yourself.