Poll ending October 1, 2011 asked the following:
How do you feel when you see someone close to you “make” it?
The voting choices were: Lost, Motivated, Slightly Threatened, Ecstatic, Mixed Feelings
What really would such a poll questionnaire hope to accomplish, if not stir up tabloid quality debate?
Let us look at this question closely, and pay attention to the key words in it, someone close to you. How many times have we watched, then seen, loved ones attain their goals. We are especially happy for those who seem to have struggled the most, or overcome the greater obstacles. Instantly, we are happy. After a little while however, when the euphoria dies down, we are left looking at our own “colossal” messes, magnified in light of our loved one’s achievements, and our own sense of dissatisfaction.
At first, looking at where we are, and where we would like to be can be daunting. We have an immediate source to compare to, and are actively doing this, envying our loved one’s ability to overcome obstacles, wondering where s/he got off complaining alongside you and being heard. When was your turn supposed to come? Fighting these feelings; feeling lost, motivated, slightly threatened and ecstatic amongst others, is a natural and human condition. We are fool to pretend we do not have any kind of feelings toward a loved one’s success. Even if the success was anticipated, such a feeling exists.
The real question, is what we do with the feelings we have, regarding loved ones, in regard to our own situations. It is an invitation to acknowledge our feelings, our situation, and look excitedly toward our own capabilities, experiences, and successes, propelled by the knowledge that if it could happen to someone that we know, it could happen to us!